Rants:

Seagulls: Those darn seagulls, flying all over campus, pooping on some unfortunate soul whose day has now been completely screwed because of those damn seagulls. The seagulls are a menace to our campus, bothering the students to the point where they get paranoid of seagull poop and constantly watch the skies during lunch. Some of those seagulls don’t even know how to fly properly, or follow FAA rules of close proximity flying. I remember late last year, walking along next to the Science Lecture Hall minding my own business, when out of nowhere this daredevil seagull decided to try some low level flying and would have hit me square in the face, had I not ducked in time. Having nearly maintained a head-on collision with a seagull has gotten me slightly paranoid about them and has me constantly scanning the skies to make sure that my skull doesn’t get sliced open by one of those scheming, devilish, hell-spawn of a bird.

Black Clad Pedestrians: Wearing all black, cool.  Wearing all black while going out for a walk in the dark? Not cool. To anyone who goes out for a walk, after dark, wearing all black, we cannot see you. Unless you’re asking for the sweet release of death, I seriously suggest you invest in some brighter clothing. Not only will it make it easier for drivers to see you, but it might also make your day a little brighter. There’s nothing more annoying than having to drive 15 miles an hour under the speed limit on residential streets because you’re scanning for pedestrians faster than the Soviet Union was for nuclear missiles during the Cold War.

Computer Cable Management: Does this wire go here? Or over there? Or maybe it goes all the way over there? Cables. Cables used to connect devices or earbuds, unless you have an iPhone 7, then these are an absolute pain with the way they seem to magically tangle themselves. It’s absolutely inexplicable, like how the USB never goes in right on the first try, or how cats always land on their furry little paws. No matter how organized you set up your gaming rig, the cables always tangle and end up frustrating you more than those damn seagulls that don’t know how to fly properly. I have spent many an hour cleaning up and rearranging the cables that run to and fro from my computer to the various peripherals connected, and somehow, by the time I’m done, it’s always exponentially worse than when I started the “cable management” process.

Raves:

Mechanical Keyboards: Click clack click clack. Mechanical keyboards, the best of the best.  These keyboards are absolutely magnificent. Mechanical keyboards, like the Cadillacs of keyboards, the luxury and sportiness all in one package that provides an extravagant experience for the writer. Not only do these boards provide an amazing symphony for your ears, but they also provide a peppy, tactile feel for your fingers, a feeling which one will yearn for when using the crappy school keyboards. The tactile bump and the audible click produced by these marvelous mechanical boards are irresistible to anyone who spends time on the computer. Mechanical keyboards are more customizable than a rooted android phone, with customization options ranging from a sticker-bombed board to custom keys designed to your liking, or if you prefer something more luxurious, than opt for the mahogany board with cyan keys, which is a combination that would make anyone’s jaw drop.

Costco: “Bigger is better; in everything,” Costco is the epitome of these valuable words said by Freddy Mercury. Costco has everything, literally everything that one would need to survive, and the best part? It is always in massive quantities. They have stacks on stacks of car batteries, stockpiles of food, delicious food waiting to be eaten. Imagine a zombie apocalypse which Costco has plenty of food, enough tools inside, even in the tire center to defend against the oncoming zombie hordes, and electricity because of all the car batteries that are stacked on shelves. It is the perfect place to set up a rescue center in the event of an apocalypse. Anyway, Costco sells everything bigger and better than any other store out there. Where else can you buy a 56oz bag of Peanut M&Ms and not get judged for it?

Steam Sales: Steam Summer Sales are well-known because of the alluring prices and insane deals that can be had on some of the best titles. Sometimes, games are also offered up to 75% off which is also very enticing. Almost every game on Steam goes for at least 25% off, while the average seems to be roughly 40 to 50% off during the Summer Sale, and while this is great for the buyer, it turns into a rather unfortunate event for the buyer’s wallet, as there will probably not be any money left in it once the sale is over. These summer sales are also bundled, meaning that you can get all the GTA titles for the price of GTA V and a little more. The same goes for all the Assassin’s Creed titles, which is extremely tempting because of the low prices.